


i breathe out now, and we fall back in

by felixfvlicis



Category: Suits (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-27
Updated: 2016-02-27
Packaged: 2018-05-23 15:01:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6120163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/felixfvlicis/pseuds/felixfvlicis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Episode tag to 5x15 "Tick Tock" -- Harvey shows up at Donna's apartment, frustrated, guilt-ridden, and drops one hell of a bombshell.</p><p>Hope you like it.  I haven't written a story in a very long time, so to say that I'm "rusty" is an understatement.  My Harvey/Mike ship is still a-sailing, though!  xoxo.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i breathe out now, and we fall back in

Anita Gibbs will be the death of Pearson-Specter-Litt unless Harvey can come up with a legal way to get a mistrial for Mike and save all of their asses.  This is going to be more difficult than any of them realized.  

***

Harvey's sitting at his desk, his eyes flitting from his keyboard to the screen on his tablet.  The tips of his fingers are digging into his forehead, his thumbs are rubbed raw from flipping through so many files, and he's still without a solution to save Mike, to save himself.  Saving Mike is what Harvey does, or did, up until six months ago, when Mike accepted his Junior Partner position at the firm.  Since that time, Mike has made significant strides: building relationships with clients, landing clients without a co-pilot, and has even begun cohabitating with Rachel - they're to be married in the fall.  Harvey couldn't be prouder, of course, but as Mike's been thriving, Harvey's done the complete opposite.

***

A knock on his office door rips Harvey from his thoughts.  It's Jessica.  Her voice is firm, calm, but it hits Harvey like a gun ready to be fired.  "Harvey, I don't know what the hell you're planning, but you better pick up the pace, because the jury is going to decide Mike's -- our -- fate tomorrow morning.  Oh, and, for god's sake, whatever you do, make sure it's legal.  I happen to enjoy my office view."  Harvey knows better than to say anything and simply nods as she turns and walks away.  He lets out a hefty sigh and he gets up from his desk, walking out of his office.

***

He's not sure how he ends up at Donna's apartment, but his knocking is a silent admission.  He had nowhere else to go, and he, for the first time in a long time, doesn't know what to do.  As the door opens, Donna looks at Harvey expectantly, eyebrows raised, but all Harvey can do is shake his head.  "Harvey ..." she says, her voice thick with concern, with a hint of a question lingering in the back of her throat.  When Harvey looks up to meet her gaze, his eyes are glassy, his jaw tightly clenched.  "I can't, Donna.  I can't --".  Realizing he's completely exasperated, her hands find themselves around his shoulders as she guides him inside to sit down.

***

Donna's sitting across from him, staring at him, eagerly awaiting for that moment when the light bulb goes off -- when he gets this brilliant idea to save Mike, to save himself and silently thanks her for letting him in.  ... Except that moment never comes.  She twirls her wine around in its glass once more, inhales and begins.  "I know you're thinking of turning yourself in.  Before you protest -- don't fall on your own sword again.   _Please_."  Her voice, laden with urgency, breaks when she says 'please'.  Harvey shoots her a surprised look before clasping his hands together in his lap and mumbling a reply, barely audible, "I have to".  Donna, of course, disagrees, her voice raised as she offers a rebuttal, which causes Harvey to rise from his seat.  He steps back from her, wanting as much distance between them as possible, as he loosens the collar of his white shirt.  It feels as though the room is becoming smaller, he's beginning to sweat, and his throat is so tight that he can barely swallow.  After what feels like an eternity, he releases a broken, shaky sigh.  "I have to fall on my sword, because it's my fault."  This admission is so quiet that it's almost inaudible, but Donna catches it.  Harvey's still not looking at her, because he feels his vision begin to blur from the tears forming in his eyes.  "No, it's not." she says, as she attempts to be firmly reassuring, but it doesn't work.  She's still speaking, but at this point, Harvey's so deep inside himself that he can't hear her.  His mind is racing, and he doesn't realize it, but he's backed himself into a literal corner, his hip brushing up against her counter.  

***

"It's my fault.  I got him into this mess." Harvey admits, almost with a shameful tone.  "I chose to hire him, only because I thought it would be beneficial to have someone around, to learn from me.  I never expected Mike to teach me things, I never expected to learn from him."  As Harvey's talking, Donna's eyes are brimming with tears, because she knows he's about to come to the realization that she's known about as long as Mike has worked at Pearson-Specter-Litt.  Harvey lifts his gaze from the floor and meets Donna's eyes.  There's a lump the size of Texas rising in his throat, and he feels like his whole body is convulsing.  "I never ... I never expected to fall in love with him."  Harvey squints his eyes shut immediately, feeling much too vulnerable in this moment, inhales, and lets out a shaky breath.  "I have to save him, god dammit.  Because I don't know who the hell I am without him."  

***

When he opens his eyes, he finds Donna standing at his side.  "Look at me, Harvey." she commands, as she places her hand gently on his shoulder.  "Be there for Mike in the morning.  Because he needs you just as much as you need him.  Be by his side when he walks into that courtroom.  There's no one he'd rather have there, trust me."

***

As Harvey walks out of Donna's building, he understands the gravity of his admission, one that he'll never reveal to Mike.  He'll do everything he possibly can for the kid, up until the eleventh hour and even beyond, because Mike's given Harvey something he thought he'd never experience again: a sense of family.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Title taken from James Bay's "Incomplete"


End file.
